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Tuesday, June 12, 2018

Live Unapologetically!

This is something that’s been on my mind for a while - that feeling ... that compulsion to constantly apologize. I’m not talking about those moments when you genuinely do need to say sorry. I’ve noticed that we often apologize for things where no wrong was done ....

We apologize for things we love.
We apologize for taking care of ourselves.
We apologize for asking what we need.
We apologize for what we believe.
We apologize for not doing what others want.
We apologize ...
We apologize ...
We apologize ...
We apologize for BEING OURSELVES.

When did we start believing this was the norm? When did we start believing that who we are was something that needed that disclaimer of “I’m sorry.”? What I’m finding, in my own life, is that we not only train ourselves that something is wrong with us or that we are somehow less than, but we also train those AROUND US. People become accustomed to expecting us to apologize for everything - even those things that are not our fault. It becomes easy to become the “whipping boy/girl” because we flog ourselves for every perceived slight.

If you do something wrong - apologize. 
If you’re unsure - talk with someone you trust and do a reality check. 

This is a tool I learned from my therapist so instead of beating myself over something that isn’t mine, I can ask another for their opinion. It’s been a lifesaver and has helped me break hurtful habits and remove things from my life that were damaging my spirit.

So, I have a challenge for everyone, should you want to do it *winks* It’s twofold -

1. Pay attention to the things you say out loud and to yourself. How many times do you say sorry out of habit, because you feel you have to, or for things that aren’t your responsibility?
2. This is one I’m trying to embrace - live each day UNAPOLOGETICALLY. Be you! Live for YOU. Family and friends are wonderful but they shouldn’t dictate who you are. Even if you’re the only one who loves or believes something, that’s OKAY. Did you hear me? Let me say it again ... it’s OKAY. You are beautifully unique and amazing and we need you to be YOU! Not a shadow or extension of something else.

You.
Gloriously YOU.

I’m working on this challenge myself. It’s been a process and I know I still have work to do. It’s been over a year but oh what a year it’s been! Happiness comes from letting go of fear, habits that no longer serve, and fully embracing the gifts and light you bring to the world. Don’t EVER dull your sparkle or hold yourself back.

And please, for you ... the world ... don’t apologize for being YOU!
Love you. Now go conquer the world and SHINE!

Bels xoxo #dare2fly

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